I'm Just Visiting This Planet

What can anyone say? Jerome Herbert Norman Selman was a giant of a man, in every way. Lovable, annoying, easy going, short tempered. He was a man of contradictions (aren't we all?). The world is a better place because he lived and I will miss him. His funeral was wonderful (he would have been proud) and his children eulogized him beautifully. His daughters in law (Tillie and me) were proud to be his pall bearers. This picture of Ruth, Matt, Jerry and Anne was taken two years ago when we celebrated Ruth and Jerry's 60th wedding anniversary. I'll remember him like this-before his leg was amputated, before he spent 227 out of the last 365 days at the VA Medical Center, before he was on the ventilator. Do not go gentle into that good night, Old age should burn and rave at close of day; Rage, rage against the dying of the light. Dylan Thomas

We've been struggling for the last two years with Anne's father's health-he's been in and out of the VA Hospital (more in than out). We celebrated his 89th birthday during Rosh Hashanah. He didn't look well, but he was home, and that was a blessing. Tuesday he had two incidents of cardiac arrest. We spent Tuesday and most of Wednesday at the hospital. Anne's going in today, and we're both going in on Sunday. So much of our conversation has revolved around the big issues (please, please don't ever let me be on a ventilator) and the mundane (where will we sit shiva? how many people will we feed after the funeral?) Jerry will probably die this week at the age of 89. The weird thing about Jerry is that many years ago, a palmist reading his palm told him he'd live to be 89-which is also the age at which his mother, Nanny, died. We had a big party for her 89th and that was it! Our friend Donna died in May at the age of 53. You never really know, do